Okay, now we have the men's concept of the ratings women have for men.
Where is the rating system men have for women?
What puts one woman on the 'I just want to fuck ladder'. The I want to fuck and date but not marry... the I want to fuck date and maybe marry?
I mean we all see 'skanks' with 'nice' men and sometimes they even marry the 'skanks'-- then we see the prudes with hot guys and they too married them.
Then we see the 'nice' girls that never marry and only find guys that to want fuck them----
come on guys help with this one.
My real question is why do some 'skanks' get the good men- and nice girls don't. This is the question that pisses us women off!
Domination and submission versus s and m
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It came to my attention recently with a male friend who is interested in
masochism and submission- hint BIG DIFFERENCE
from wikopedia- I could not link- pe...
14 years ago
7 comments:
"My real question is why do some 'skanks' get the good men- and nice girls don't. This is the question that pisses us women off!"
Well, it's really not that difficult to understand.
If you're familiar with that awful book, "The Rules" written by those divorced women (ain't irony great?) you'll see that much of what they deem as "rules" are simply the old, tired "chase me" game. Make him wait, don't call him, never be too available and all the rest.
The authors are labouring under this delusion that men somehow enjoy these games.
Granted, there ARE males who enjoy "chase me" games. Most of them are under the age of 10, and those who are in it for one thing and one thing only.
But a good and mature man will have zero time for such nonsense.
See, when a woman says (in either words or actions, sometimes both) that, "In order to have me, you must first chase me, put up with my drama and all the rest," she is objectifying herself. She's saying, "I have something you want and in order for you to have it, you'll have to play by my rules - rules which, by the way, change depending upon my whim - do A, B and C in the right order at the right time then maybe, just maybe, I might favour you with my company."
And what does that get you?
Let's say that a man does the chasing and finally gets intimate contact.
He'll probably then skedaddle. After all, it's not her that he was after, it's what she could provide. Once he's been successful in his chase, the thrill is gone. She'd dumped. Then she'll cry the blues because he did exactly what she wanted him to do.
So if your aim is a succession of very short-term relationships, ending shortly after each intimate contact, then the "chase me" game is the way to go.
But if your aim is a meaningful relationship with a good man, then "chase me" games won't get you anywhere.
A good man respects a woman who knows what she wants, isn't afraid to be assertive about it and is clear about her intentions.
But the "chase me" games that some - alas, many - women play are the polar opposite of that.
Want to score a good man? Dispense with the games.
How true anonymous, but it also applies to the ones {supposed good girls}, that let you get intimate to different levels and still back track as if nothing happened and still want or need to be chased. Or back to just friends, ouch! Just more f'en games, excuses, and what not's to get or do whatever the "lady" feels she needs, it's like grow-up and get over it, and yourself, try to be happy and enjoy life.
Hmmm. thanks guys. However, I do think most men like the 'game'. They like to pursue 'something' that has value.
You see we all want 'things' that are a step or two up from where we are at any particular time in life. Hence men want women they think are 'better' than they are on some level. Likewise women want men that are better than they are on some level.
I like the podium concept.....use whatever skill it is you have to make yourself shine while in the light of the person you are interested in.
Let them see how wonderful you are -at something!
Sorry, but I also think women should still play a bit of the game once caught!
Come on we still like to think the object of our desires is a tad mysterious... not be confused with bitchy- or making you jealous- just keep the podium effect going--- long after you are 'comfortable'.
Original poster back atcha to address this: "However, I do think most men like the 'game'."
See, this is where the wheels start to fall off.
There ARE men that like the whole "chase" thing. Yes, I get that.
And those are exactly the same fellows who, once they have snagged their quarry, will be off chasing something/someone else. They've achieved their goal. Time for a new challenge.
So if a woman insists on being pursued, she'll attract those men that are in it for the chase and little else. Then once he's off chasing someone else, she'll cry and moan and complain that there aren't any good, solid men around who aren't into games.
Like, WTF??
Look, here's the thing: A good man works hard at his career, in his community, in his social circle, for his nation and maybe even for his church (if he's into such things). Making a good man "chase" or have to work yet again in the context of a romantic relationship is, in my opinion, exactly the wrong thing to do.
Now, I'm not suggesting that a woman should just roll over (metaphorically speaking) and be 'easy.' But I am suggesting that if a woman sets herself up as a sex object - because, let's face it, the whole "chase me" game is just that - then she shouldn't be surprised when she gets treated like that.
Yes, I agree with you- I think we may be speaking the same language but different dialects.
A woman does not go out with just anyone- he has to show her, in my opinion and hence the advent of the 'rules' ( I think).
If a man asks a girl out the first time they meet she may or may not agree--- depends on way too many variables.
Sometimes, this is not politically correct- but- if she is very attractive and a 'keeper' she may not be readily avaible simply due to her having to many men asking her out- and she wants to ensure she is spending her time with someone she finds 'valuable'- (not in the money sense- hence skank) but valuable for her to spend her time on.
So, she may require a little more coaxing- simple like trying to land a big sale or deal-- you have to convince her you are worthy of her time.
Likewise- some guys can be Cads and that repuation often precedes them- they are the ones that girls will play the game with often hoping that he will play and then she will feel she is 'special'. Most often than not- she is not special and her tears and your point become reality.
Having said all that--- a man if he is really interested in a woman will not stop at anything until he gets her--- or gets arrested!
BUT- we are talking normal people here not the pyshco--- gosh I hope the pyshcos dont read this!
Jee don't think many are left- I think I dated all the nuts out there-- hence again while still single--- Isn't it the rule those that can't teach!
Looking forward to more comments
"a man if he is really interested in a woman will not stop at anything until he gets her"
Only men with little or no self-respect will do that.
A good man will respect a "no," take her at her word and cease the pursuit.
After all, no means no, right?
Those men who continue the pursuit after she has made her negative intentions clear is either desperate or isn't listening to her.
Yes, I see what you mean- again same language different dialects.
A firm NO- is a firm NO- but-as we know women often do not give a firm NO. Sometimes they go on a date but are also dating other men- or have indicated they 'may' be interested, it is then that 'sane' men will go the extra mile to 'prove' they are really intersted in making the girl his !
I mean really- most women will agree with me on this one. Men are most generally the nicest to us before we marry them!
Hence the 'big rock' trust me- MOST women do not ever get a nice piece of jewellery after that- YES there are the exceptions but not most often. Once the man has his prey- he relaxes..............
that opens up another blog article (let me look into this one a bit) why do women cheat???
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